When I was young I remember believing that if only one cared enough about others and loved others enough, … even the most misunderstood, egotistical, self-serving, deceitful, conniving, manipulative, and treacherous illegitimate child of Satan could be transformed into a caring, loving person. In reality, I never really thought of anyone as an illegitimate child of Satan; I sometimes referred to irritants as a pack of worms to indicate disagreement with their ignoble characteristics, but for the most part I did not even know enough to use such terms to describe people and would have found such terms excessively harsh and even injurious. When I was young, I based most of my views on emotion while rejecting the simplest and most obvious intellectual evidence that flashed neon warnings that my concepts were in error. I felt very strongly that all anyone needed was enough care and love, and if only one cared and loved another adequately, the other person would be transformed into a loving, caring person … by the process of osmoses if by no other means. (Christ provides proof of my reasoning; simply behold how He provided virtually infinite love and care to hoards of people, and in the end most of them turned on Him like the pack of ruthless worms they were as repayment for all His loving kindness to them.) This sort of rejection of truth so that one can feel good about oneself can be suicidal when carried to extremes because many people delight in dominating and destroying others; often in a most soft-spoken, gentle, and pious fashion they have developed to convince others that every self-serving, conniving, deceitful, and manipulative act is at worst an accident; instead of a calculated way of life for such self-serving worms who can always explain that their every self-serving, egotistical, malicious thought, act, word, and deed had only the most noble and honorable intentions; that they did not mean for their bold-faced lies and back-stabbing treachery to reveal that they had no respect or regard for you, nor were their flagrant lies intended to expose their view that you were the stupidest, most gullible tool or fool they had encountered in their entire lives, or at least in recent years; they were merely trying not to hurt your feelings and help you in some fashion when they avoided anything and everything by way of honesty and truth. In younger years I simply chose not to accept truth that rotten people were rotten; I much preferred to believe that others were caring, loving, decent, honorable people who were basically like me and would never want to cause injury or pain. I confess that it was painful to learn and to accept that others were not always truthful, noble, decent, and kind. In younger years such concepts were virtually incomprehensible to me.

The first glowing clue that it would be necessary to alter my perspective of others occurred while working for federal government. I had been promised a promotion, had the handwritten statement from my supervisor, considered making a photocopy of it, but decided my supervisor was so honorable and trustworthy that I need not bother to keep a copy … until I reminded said supervisor of the statement and was informed, “L.J., I don’t remember saying anything like that! Are you SURE you’re not imagining things?” Imagine my surprise at this revelation of the true nature of the supervisor; it was something of a shock to my emotional system, and in the back of my awareness intellect was informing, “I told you so, and you refused to listen.” When my color returned, about three days later or so a coworker commented after the fact, it occurred that perchance I had best listen to truth and forego my emotional views of the world if I wanted to survive. Thus came my initial wake-up call for the need to switch from using feelings of strong emotion as the basis for my views and the necessity to use God-given intellectual abilities to evaluate information for truth and accuracy. Emotional addiction must be something like drug addiction; one simply craves and burns with the longing and desire to believe that others are decent, honorable types, and even after having such glaring evidence by way of truth burned into one’s memory, emotion waged a bitter war against logic and intellect in efforts to remain in control; emotion necessarily lost as survival became of paramount importance, and in order to survive, I was forced to rely on truth, logic, and intellect. On Valentine’s Day my supervisor gave me a valentine with the picture of a cute lion that read, “No lion, be my valentine,” or some such comment designed to repair the damage to my strong emotional views of others; it didn’t work because logic and intellect had overpowered emotion; it is the only time that love was transformed into hate, and for several years I wondered if I ever would overcome the intense hatred of that supervisor. I was quite embarrassed to discover that after twenty or thirty years that when recalling the vicious, conniving, ignoble supervisor the hate had died but the feelings of love were still lurking beneath the surface, flying in the face of logic and intellect in stealth mode. Clearly, when dealing with people one must analyze and evaluate the incoming information for truth and accuracy.

With Father-God there is never a need to perform such analytical evaluations because everything He says is truth and completely accurate. With people, on the other hand, nearly everything must be evaluated for accuracy even when they are telling the truth; and a good many people choose not to tell the truth when truth either throws them in a bad light or will fail to get for them whatever they want. Needless to say, I much prefer dealing with Father-God than with people.
Some interesting situations invariably develop when having to deal with people.

I have a friend, Helen, in Canada who was a missionary medical doctor in Nepal or that general area for about 40 years. Helen and I have totally different views on health care as it relates to health insurance. Helen leans to the view that everyone should be covered by a national health-care plan of some sort, whereas I adamantly adhere to the view that Father-God has ultimate control, that here in the United States federal government has no constitutional authority whatever to meddle in health care or education, and that virtually any time federal government involves itself in social welfare matters, the result is corruption wrapped with endless red tape such that lazy, incompetent types are universally advanced while hardworking, decent types are universally restricted. I spoke to Father-God on this matter. Helen started a Christian hospital in Nepal in the 1950s or thereabouts and had to deal with an anti-Christian government for decades. Moreover, her fellow missionary workers started a Christian school, and Helen observed firsthand how anti-Christians in the government took rigorous measures to dominate and destroy to the fullest extent possible all the Christian works achieved by the school and the hospital. Therefore, I am completely mystified as to how she logically defends the view that government involvement in health care, education, or anything else is beneficial; particularly after the government of Nepal seized control of the Christian school; and hospital and mandated the Christians hire non-Christian personnel … a good deal similar to what occurred here in the United States when aggressive communism (euphemistically called “affirmative action”) was instituted by de facto communists in federal government. In Nepal, communist activists essentially seized control of the hospital and initiated a strike, which was only possible because the government had mandated that Christians could not be hired for jobs that anti-Christians could do.

I made the statement early on in comments related to Helen’s views that my views were based on intellect and not based on emotion, and when I made the comment, it occurred that the statement might suggest that someone with a medical doctor’s degree lacked intellect, which is not actually the case; it is more a case of using emotion instead of intellect, just as I had done in younger years until Father-God arranged for a very rude wake-up call via my self-serving supervisor. Anyway, it was Helen’s desire that everyone have health coverage and my desire that federal government adhere to the Constitution and stay out of health care and education. These conflicting views could give the appearance that Helen wants what is best for others while potentially causing me to appear like a cold-blood, ruthless, sadist who enjoys keeping people in ill health, uneducated, and bound to my “more enlightened” political views when in reality, the best intentions of people who promote more government involvement and control are the ones who end up causing people to have poor health care, to remain uneducated, and to conform to their “more enlightened” political views. Obviously, neither Helen nor I want anyone to be locked into a life of misery and suffering, but our different takes on government involvement in social issues certainly leave room for politicians to promote one or the other of us as self-serving sadists when neither of us are. Ironically, it was only a few decades back, roughly in the 1950s and 1960s, that health care was not all that expensive, and people who entered the health-care profession generally did so because they had a desire to help others instead of the modern desire to get rich quick off of the suffering and misfortunes of others; which is where the need for health insurance has its roots. Anyway, in 2007 Helen commented that she was 80 years old; I was somewhat tempted to tell her that she is in her prime, that Sarah was 90 when Isaac was born; except that I’m already feeling the aches and pains related to age and am nearly 30 years younger and can only imagine the challenges that an additional 30 years might bring in fatigue and discomfort. Worse yet, Helen lives in cold Canada, whereas I live in the relatively warm United States. At any rate, awareness of well-educated people who choose to use emotion instead of intellect as the basis for decisions explains other occurrences in life.

It happened that while speaking to Father-God that I apparently did an automatic spiritual-level scan with awareness of my pest following’s efforts to justify themselves. The degree people are willing to deceive themselves is remarkable at the very least. I was acutely aware of the desire of pests to kill me by any means available to them, provided they could not be held accountable for murder, of course; loosely analogously to the movie, The Wizard of Oz, wherein the Wicked Witch of the West pronounces that these things must be done “delicately.” A number of situations come to mind when considering the activities of self-serving, egotistical children of Satan, who generally claim their every self-serving and self-gratifying act is the will of God, or is designed to bring glory to God, or in some manner is sanctioned by God. Invariably, such pests cast others in a poor light.

I recall the incident in eighth-grade English when for no apparent reason I simply attacked classmate, Keith, who was doing his dirty deeds of punching me when the teacher was not looking. I also thought of the near-incident during twelfth grade when I desperately desired to hit Greg (with the black hair) in the side of the head with the oak newspaper holder when all Greg was doing was sitting there minding his own business (except for touching my face, my books, my hands, flicking the newspaper, etc.), and just out of the blue for no apparent reason it would have appeared that I suddenly attacked him and cracked his thick little skull; or so it would likely have been reported. And then there is my pest following that followed me from Texas to West Virginia to Arizona where they continued to challenge me time and again such that ultimately Father-God instructed that I had to engage in spiritual-level combat on the physical level when a pest demanded that I shake hands with him so that he could attempt to inflict physical injury, after which he apparently died; therefore, the pest following decreed that I was not of God, that had I been of God I would not have held them accountable, that I was required to love all their sick, warped, twisted efforts to destroy me by whatever means available to them, and for me to dare to defend myself was proof to the pest following that I was not of their father, Satan, whom they clearly worship as God. (Of course, it is impolite to cite the Great Flood initiated by God during the time of Noah; and outright rude to mention that God had only one penalty, death, for violation of any of His laws during the time of Moses and the Exodus. People promoting emotional views regularly find such truths irrelevant and immaterial to their self-serving agendas and, therefore, do not want them mentioned.) There were the incidents related to this pest following that chose to follow me to California, to Washington, to Minnesota, to New York, etc.; clearly I forced myself onto the pest following every place I went; no doubt by vigorous employment of my over-active imagination, feelings of self-importance, and my sizeable ego such that the pest following simply could not escape me; no matter where I went.

Nonetheless, from the emotional perspective of the pest following, I was always to blame for their efforts to destroy me; I clearly had forced them to stalk and photograph me, left them no choice but to arrange for thugs to attack me, and was entirely responsible for all their efforts to assassinate me wherever I went; even in Canada while driving to or from Alaska when something like a bullet ripped a half-inch of the vinyl top and scratched the steel roof of the car just inches above the windshield and in the area of my head; and on the same trip that abrupt shattering of the large, rear window or windshield that suddenly burst into thousands of pieces after a large RV traveling in the opposite direction passed me. While traveling from West Virginia to Spokane, Washington, I recall noting police cars in several states just happening to follow my cross-country travels, in particular in Montana or Wyoming when I had stopped in a very isolate area to rest. To my amazement a state police unit came down the highway, pulled off, circled my car, and then continued; due to pure coincidence, my over-active imagination, or feelings of self-importance, no doubt, but which could explain how the young man in Spokane just happened to walk near me my first day there and smirk, “People are following me, and I’ve got to get away from here,” or some such comment. I had traveled secondary roads and avoided the Interstate in efforts to be less visible on my trip to Spokane. I had driven through Yellowstone Park at a fast pace despite the potholes in the road because a smaller vehicle seemed to be following me; my larger tires readily rolled over the potholes, which seemed to be a bit more inhibiting to the speed of vehicles with smaller tires; clearly my efforts to evade the pest following did not work. Nonetheless, from the emotional perspective of the pest following, I had literally forced them to mobilize police forces from the Appalachian Mountains to the Rocky Mountains to keep track of me. How fortunate for me that a police officer in the City of Spokane happened to be in my general area the night I arrived; therefore, I asked for directions on how to get to a specific address, knowing that the officer was likely a recruit of the snooping, skulking pest following and that I might as well take advantage of the available information from someone who undoubtedly knew the streets. But from the perspective of most people, all these things were shear coincidences, add an over-active imagination, and let’s not forget my feelings of self-importance.

Anyway, while discussing matters with MY Father-God, I mentioned these annoyances and my awareness that the pest following held to the conviction that all their self-serving, self-aggrandizing, sadistic, egotistical, and mentally sick actions were manifestations of their “superior enlightenment,” their “more noble nature,” and their professed concern for national security, scientific research, or just anything but what truth revealed. Somehow these self-serving, sadistic sick-o creatures were firmly convinced that they had a right to steal that which belonged to others, and that all their lies, deceptions, and lusts for power, dominance, and control over others was to be attributed to the will of God, which they generally claimed to be promoting; despite the fact that their every action and deed revealed them as having the same lusts and desires displayed by their spiritual father, Satan, who also lusted for power, dominance, and control over others.

On the random-pest front, being the irritants not actually recruited as members of the pest following that developed from the full-background investigation, were some fellow teachers, being “black-collar experts.” Modern “experts” universally substitute emotion for intellect as the basis for decisions. Case-in-point is the English teacher who displayed desires to dominate my chemistry class because her daughter was in the class. Telling the woman that I made the decision for what occurred in my classes proved incomprehensible to her emotional reference system. Stating to her and the principal that she would never dictate what occurred in my classes went right over her head as she had strong emotional feelings that motivated her efforts to usurp my authority and control. Reiterating the statement to her, her husband, and the principal also proved indecipherable to the woman since her emotions informed that if only she were aggressive and obnoxious, she could succeed in her desire to dominate and destroy. Even after she had demanded and been told that I had paid for the equipment and it was my personal property, her emotional response was that she would return the equipment when she was finished with it; ownership being irrelevant to her emotional reference system; the next day I decided she was permanently finished with my video equipment. Incredibly, even after flagrantly trying her level best to dominate and destroy my credibility, the emotional woman sent students to my classroom with the request that I turn over my video equipment to the irritant yet again; I sent the students to the office. One must understand that it was my fault for any conflict that developed with the English teacher as I was simply the most uncooperative teacher in the school; from her “black-collar expert” emotional perspective, of course. One remains uncertain how jealousy is to be accommodated so that pests and irritants are satiated and stop doing all the irritating and pesky things they do using emotions as the basis for their spite. Jealousy is an emotion that is difficult to accommodate. My most seasoned and superb high school history teacher during twelfth grade commented that she regarded jealousy as a form of insanity; not a far cry from the truth by all indications when intellect is used to evaluate jealousy. Black-collar experts lust for power and dominance over others, and they are among the most jealous, petty, and argumentative creatures to be found.

Another example of using emotion instead of intellect was observed in a relative who commented that he hated the President with a passion. I asked him to explain the basis for his hatred, and he could not; and generally did not need to explain his feelings so long as he dealt with people who used emotion instead of intellect for interpreting comments. I, on the other hand, can virtually always explain the basis for my views because Father-God required that I learn to use intellect as the basis for interpreting information and forming opinions, thereby requiring that I learn to accept truth even when I did not like the truth, such as viewing some people as egotistical, self-serving, deceitful, conniving, manipulative, and treacherous illegitimate children of Satan; a hard pill to swallow when one feels very strongly that love and care will transform them into caring, loving individuals. Consequently, I can state that I despise, loath, abhor, and detest the pest following simply because they have made recurring efforts to dominate and destroy me. Obviously, people who lust for power, dominance, and control over others and are jealous of everyone with superior abilities of any sort are not transformed by love and care, which they often regard as weaknesses that empower them to control and dominate. On the other hand, Father-God, Who is omnipotent and omniscient, already has power to dominate everyone and everything and possesses all knowledge, but He chooses to grant free will to many of His created beings.

In younger years I based my views mainly on emotion instead of intellect, which is pretty much what all small children do. Therefore, I have keen awareness of the strong convictions of people who choose to use their personal feeling and reject all truth that conflicts with their emotions. It frequently takes a will and a desire, or the need to survive, in order to inspire the use of intellect and truth as the basis for decisions. Father-God noted my flawed use of emotions, and with His perfect wisdom He arranged and permitted contacts that rectified the problem, and none too gently, I might add, but apparently of precisely the correct level of shock, gravity, intensity, and duration necessary for my specific needs. Therefore, my personal motivation occurred in conjunction with the disastrous mind-linking experience with awareness that in order to survive, I absolutely had to rely on intellect because my emotions were shattered into thousands of pieces, along with views of the wonderful goodness and caring nature of people, which was a carry-over onto the physical level based on my view of Father-God and Mother-God. I would not wish the experience on anyone for whom I cared, and despite my making angry statements to Father-God that every member of the pest following can burn in Hell forever, I would even be hesitant to wish the corrective experience onto my hated pest following since it was just by the grace of God that I survived at all; it was undoubtedly one of the most difficult lessons of my life, and certainly it ended up restricting my use of emotions when dealing with people. When one has very nearly been drained of every drop of blood, one tends to use a bit more care when giving blood to others, figuratively speaking, of course. Undoubtedly, I am vastly less sensitive than in younger years, and after decades of dealing with the pest following, I sometimes fear that I have been in justice-mode for so long that I am rather out-of-touch with the love-mode common to Father-God; except when dealing with Father-God, Who has always remained infinitely trustworthy on all levels. Nonetheless, with people I tend to use intellect far more than emotion simply because I have no desire to repeat the errors that I made in younger years.

In younger years I recall my admiration for Anita Sanvito’s noble dignity and self-control. I did not believe that I would ever achieve such self-confidence and the sure-footedness indicative of class, style, and grace because in younger years I was sensitive to everything and everybody such that the crash of a downy feather seemed to blow me away. I viewed dear Anita, on the other hand, as someone who could be standing by a hydrogen bomb when it exploded, and her dignity and self-control seemed such that the blast would be deflected away from her as she turned with the inquiry, “Did someone drop something?” In reality, I may have exceeded Anita’s noble nature and self-control; although her trials during physical life were substantial, mine match and exceed hers; possibly by light-years. Such sure-footedness and self-confidence seem to come at a high cost by way of being shaken and shattered repeatedly such that one tends to become insulated to tolerate shocks in the mega-volt range routinely, with tolerances approaching infinity. Father-God indicated that the shocking experiences were effectually a gold refinement process; I inquired, “What if there is no gold in me and only dross?” Father-God indicated that all Royal Baby Loves have purest gold inherent in their nature. At any rate, the type of dignity I admired is the type of dignity “Charm School for Career Diplomats” produces when Father-God arranges the curriculum, and such are the experiences related thereto.

On reflection, I marvel at the people gifts Father-God provided such as Bessie, Anita, Bertie and Roy, Garnet and Lon, Nancy, Ruby, John, and many others by way of time lines and intersected live spans. For Father-God the arrangements were infinitesimally simplistic, but on the Earth level they are remarkable, nonetheless.

Bessie was repossessed by Father-God in March 1993. Nancy was reposed three months later. Anita was allowed to remain until November 2004, but Roy was repossessed in 1975 and Bertie in 1989. Lon returned to Father-God in 1973; Garnet in 1991. Ruby was the most remarkable timeline when considering our entire friendship occurred in only four years. Father-God repossessed John in 1996 as best I recall, and there have been other wonderful people gifts, such as in Phoenix where I met Mary, who was Canadian and sister to Helen. Mary had been one of my students at the business college, and her loving nature inspired her to invite me for Christmas dinner after she learned that I was alone in the area; Mary subsequently invited me to a small dinner party of four she had each Saturday evening, and it was through Mary that I met her sister, Helen. In younger years Mary had been a pharmacist; she returned to Father-God in February 2007. Except for Bessie and John, all these people gifts were generally two or more decades older than me, and Bessie was the only blood relative that was clearly a gift in addition to being family. How do I know these were people-gifts from God? They were readily able to tolerate me for years and actually cared about my well-being whereas many people generally have no particular interest in me and often cannot tolerate me; hence, people who not only can tolerate me but also love and care about me are gifts from Father-God without a doubt.

Most of my teachers are no longer on the Earth. Sometimes I get awareness that they have departed; for example, my good physics professor, Erwin Doughty, began to come to mind in 2007. Although I always sent him a Christmas and an Easter card or letter, I felt inspired to write and ask him a technical question related to the reason the apparent hundred-fold energy gain in laser light could not be used to boil water and thereby create something of a perpetual energy source; I had been seeing him on the spiritual level, which indicated he was either in poor physical health or that the physical body had ceased to function. After writing him in mid summer, his daughter-in-law phoned to tell me that he had returned to Father-God in mid March 2007, and his family was very gracious in taking the time to phone and talk to me at length about him. I had stopped and seen him on one of my trips through Dallas years after I had finished at UTA and some years after the good professor had retired. And, the good professor told me that he was a believer in Father-God during a conversation while I was still in college. I was quite pleased to learn this since I had only recently become aware of Father-God’s identity when this conversation occurred.

There were other incidents of awareness that people were no longer on the Earth. For example, friend, Jill, seems to have departed from the Earth; she came to me a few times after I mentioned her, and she did not have any such ability while connected to her physical body. Jill was born in the Chicago area. The remarkable thing was that Jill’s presence was quite strong, almost as visible as someone on the physical level; this may relate to her willingness to permit me to scan her thoughts when we both were in Dallas decades ago. I last spoke to her while I was in Seattle, Washington, and she was somewhere in Massachusetts. I generally do not want to communicate with people who are no longer on the Earth; I seem to feel love for them, but they are supposed to be learning other things instead of talking to people who are physically present on the Earth. Besides, I much prefer to restrict my conversations to Father-God and Mother-God; and on rarer occasions Royal Baby Loves. Also, Father-God has not indicated that I should communicate with the physically defunct; other than a hideous trip into Lower Sheol, apparently to retrieve someone after I failed to challenge a “holy goat” who preached a Hell, fire, and brimstone damnation funeral instead of something that referenced the peace and loving nature of MY Father-God; it seems the entity was confused by the spewing out of hatred from the “holy goat” preacher. At any rate, I do not want to revisit that experience, needless to say, which occurred while I was living in Ruby’s apartment building and several years before I had conscious awareness of Father-God’s identity such that it was a horribly unsettling “dream” that inspired me to initiate an early-morning phone contact with family in West Virginia to ensure the confusion was cleared via reading Bible verses when I did not even own a Bible myself at the time, yet on return to the physical body I knew this was a crucial element that had to be followed. Lord, but that was a grizzly experience by way of “dreams”; in which Father-God and Mother-God spoke to me simultaneously to inform that I was not on my assigned world and was to return promptly, which I related to the confused person. It occurs that although I could hear The Royal Perfect Love readily on the spiritual level, the person I was helping could not. I promptly returned to the Earth as though this were something I did routinely, which apparently was the case since I knew a great deal more on the spiritual level than was the case on the physical level; where I promptly jettisoned all concepts of Father, Mother, God, and everything unrelated to my comfort zone of having my invisible Superman-friend as companion. Nonetheless, I had nearly exceeded the tolerance levels of the physical body by the time I returned, and it was a most unsettling experience that I did not soon forget. When Father-God arranged for me to repeat the course at an identical-type funeral, I challenge the “holy goat” that preached the same damnation, to be sure. One trip to Lower Sheol was more than enough.

I could go on and on about various experiences both on and off the Earth, but the danger is that I shall begin to babble about things and places I do not understand; at least while on the physical level. It seems that Father-God and Mother-God have taken ALL Royal Baby Loves on learning trips to all parts of creations in many dimensions and infinite worlds, which I suppose is analogous to parents who take children on camping trips, in a fashion. Rather than speak of things I do not actually understand and thereby cause confusion, it is best that I not speak of them at all; it would be essentially like having a toddler on the physical level explain where he has been and what he has done; unless the baby is speaking to someone who already knows most of the details and can fill in the gaps, the comments tend to be incomprehensible. Therefore, I shall remain largely silent. Also, I do not want what I have written to become a complete bore or to stray far from the physical reality that most people can readily understand.